This is a story that’s going to be a little more difficult to write for me, so, beloved readers, you’ll have to bear with me. This story details the one true long term serious relationship I’ve managed to hold down, and it strikes a little close to home retelling it because all of the emotions on my teaspoon come out to play here.
So let’s dive right in.
The Shepherd was my boss. Well, the venue manager for that wonderful club that let me make so many dollars over the years I was there. When he started there was a flurry of gossip amongst the girls. Did you see the new manager? Hot! And not old hot, hot hot! Is he gay? Straight? Attached? Heinous personality? As it turned out, he was straight and unattached and logically that meant that girls were laying bets over who would seduce him first.
And I won. I went the wrote I know best, the friendly, funny, sassy, witty version of myself that I do enjoy so very much was let out to play. I reined in the bitter, the money hungry, the too eccentric for her own good and dazzled him. Although he later revealed it was mainly my ass that was the attraction. Thanks dickhead.
We would have huge chats leaning on the bar where I could subtly mark out my turf from girls attempting to approach. I’d spent my time at the club carefully making friends and fostering a strong “don’t fuck with me” reputation, so no one bothered us. He then asked if I’d like to come for a drink at the other bar he managed after I knocked off, to which I agreed. He kissed me in the DJ booth like we weren’t in front of a huge throbbing crowd.
A couple of weeks later I was at the birthday party of one of the clubs bartenders, dressed up as a black swan and quite inebriated and convinced him to come pick me up. Strategically had packed a change of clothes in my bag. Went back to his place. And honestly, honestly, I don’t really remember that first night. It must’ve been good enough to go back, and not terrible enough to be memorable, but I really don’t remember much!
The Shepherd and I ended up officially dating about 6 weeks later. We were together on and off for four years and one month. When I met him he thought blow jobs were degrading to women. Fixed that problem right quick. We tried most things but kept everything very vanilla. And that was him, vanilla. He was nice enough. Smart enough. Pretty enough. Good enough in the sack. But nothing exciting, nothing amazing, no wow factor to draw me back when my guard was up and my anger was unleashed. And so I switched off. I stopped caring. I started flirting with other people. A few of the stories on here occurred during one of our off periods but it wasn’t until we’d been back together for a while and I was working a function where some hot guy made me go weak at the knees that I realised my relationship was dead. Not because I was attracted to someone else, but because I wanted to do things to him, right then and there and at that point in time I was getting changed in another room and had no sex drive at all with the Shepherd.
So I ended it. He moved out. We were casually friends for a while but don’t really speak any more.
Lesson: When someone with a libido as high as mine suddenly loses it for only one person, your body is telling you something that your brain either hasn’t caught up with or can’t comprehend.
Thanks for bearing with me folks. It was a bumpy ride.